Home on the Range

Dear Indigna,

According to the National Rifle Association, the number of women who shoot guns for fun has skyrocketed in recent years. I understand some gun clubs even have “family nights.” Is this a frightening sign of our descent into a culture of survivalist violence or a wholesome component of the healthy nuclear family?

Unarmed and Worried
Windsor, Ontario

Dear Unarmed,

What kind of pinko wuss communist are you? Oh, I see you’re from Canada; that explains it. Here in America we can think of few activities more heartwarming than families getting together to kill things. I read a beautiful story about “family night” at the Martinez (CA) Gun Club that really sums it up: “Where else can toddlers waddle alongside fathers without flinching at the sound of nearby firearms popping into the night sky?” Where, indeed? All toddlers need to learn to wander fearlessly after dark among large numbers of people shooting things with live ammo. In fact, my daughter’s entire preschool class is coming to her third birthday party at our local gun club. Don’t tell, but her “big present” is going to be “My First Semi-Automatic Handgun,” which is an adorable glittery pink with tiny images of Barbie on the bullets, and comes with its own little purse so she can take it to school!